tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7354389882188157582024-03-12T16:27:09.545-07:00From Heroin to HeavenI am so glad you stumbled across my blog... do you believe in divine connections? I do. I don't think it's by accident that you are here.
I am a recovered junkie who is now on a mission to help others find hope, freedom and frankincense. Please pull up and seat and read some... and feel free to reach out to me via email or facebook!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.comBlogger201125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-52366466674415743302019-02-12T08:06:00.001-08:002019-02-12T08:08:27.238-08:00FREE email/video series entitled: Breaking Free from the Cycle of Addiction<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jMKHHkyR_lU/XGLvFrGajYI/AAAAAAAADEg/8yh-mGWxGboI2iDiKa9ISLu5xL-TekWowCLcBGAs/s1600/beforeafter.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="938" data-original-width="960" height="312" src="https://3.bp.blogspot.com/-jMKHHkyR_lU/XGLvFrGajYI/AAAAAAAADEg/8yh-mGWxGboI2iDiKa9ISLu5xL-TekWowCLcBGAs/s320/beforeafter.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">I wandered around searching to escape my heroin addiction for many years.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">I was stuck in a sick cycle... quickly dying.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: Helvetica, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px;">Chaos and turmoil was all I knew.</span><span class="text_exposed_show" style="background-color: white; color: #1c1e21; display: inline; font-family: "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"><br /><br />Hi, I’m Mariah Freeman<span class="_5mfr" style="font-family: inherit; margin: 0px 1px;"><span class="_6qdm" style="background-image: url("https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/ted/1/16/1f4ab.png"); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: contain; color: transparent; display: inline-block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; height: 16px; text-shadow: none; vertical-align: text-bottom; width: 16px;">💫</span></span><br />Maybe you’ve read my book, From Heroin to Heaven or maybe you have no idea who I am. Lol, and that’s ok.<br /><br />Once I got my life back and began to know who I was and that I had a purpose- I was able to see with keen precision the spiritual realm. There was a battle for my soul.<br /><br />Now, after being almost 10 years sober, I am on a mission to help others overcome their battles with life-controlling issues.<br /><br />And today, I’m offering a free video series to those who need some practical guidance on what to do to start getting out of the addiction cycle.<br /><br />This is FREE and OPEN to anyone!<br />Because<span class="_5mfr" style="font-family: inherit; margin: 0px 1px;"><span class="_6qdm" style="background-image: url("https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/t8d/1/16/1f449_1f3fc.png"); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: contain; color: transparent; display: inline-block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; height: 16px; text-shadow: none; vertical-align: text-bottom; width: 16px;">👉🏼</span></span> Kingdom life. <span class="_5mfr" style="font-family: inherit; margin: 0px 1px;"><span class="_6qdm" style="background-image: url("https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/te8/1/16/1f451.png"); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: contain; color: transparent; display: inline-block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; height: 16px; text-shadow: none; vertical-align: text-bottom; width: 16px;">👑</span></span><br /><br />*Way* too many people are dying from the drug epidemic... take the help that’s being offered to you today!<br /><br />If you want to know simple and practical steps that you can start taking right now to break free from this hellish cycle then this video series is for you!<br /><br />Start watching this 4 part series entitled: Breaking Free from the Cycle of Addiction now<span class="_5mfr" style="font-family: inherit; margin: 0px 1px;"><span class="_6qdm" style="background-image: url("https://static.xx.fbcdn.net/images/emoji.php/v9/t8d/1/16/1f449_1f3fc.png"); background-repeat: no-repeat; background-size: contain; color: transparent; display: inline-block; font-family: inherit; font-size: 16px; height: 16px; text-shadow: none; vertical-align: text-bottom; width: 16px;">👉🏼</span></span></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Click this link: <a href="https://mailchi.mp/30fad9ab4724/nolongeraslave" target="_blank">Breaking Free from the Cycle of Addiction</a></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-41479714139772773352019-01-17T06:15:00.003-08:002019-01-17T06:16:33.405-08:00In need of some hope? Grab a FREE chapter of my book!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8kyMotJDJPg/XECN46-lzTI/AAAAAAAADDo/EKsxujfvM9QH5GOB84sjzp14oXNWWkpBwCLcBGAs/s1600/FROM%2BHEROIN%2BTO%2BHEAVEN%2BE%2BBOOK%2BBY%2BMARIAH%2BNOELLE%2BFREEMAN.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1024" data-original-width="600" height="320" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-8kyMotJDJPg/XECN46-lzTI/AAAAAAAADDo/EKsxujfvM9QH5GOB84sjzp14oXNWWkpBwCLcBGAs/s320/FROM%2BHEROIN%2BTO%2BHEAVEN%2BE%2BBOOK%2BBY%2BMARIAH%2BNOELLE%2BFREEMAN.jpg" width="187" /></a></div>
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Click this link:</div>
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<a href="https://mailchi.mp/0a2afc2cb8e6/mariahnoellefreewoman" target="_blank"><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Yes! I would love a FREE chapter of From Heroin to Heaven!</span></b></a></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-20373751264386219502018-08-27T11:14:00.001-07:002018-08-27T11:14:08.238-07:00She rises while it is still night<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Being a mother is the most difficult ministry I’ve faced yet.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Sleep is something that is so important to my mental and physical health and I find I sacrifice that all the time for my children.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I strive to be the Proverbs 31 woman and pray constantly for wisdom and strength... and grace for my mistakes.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">One thing that helps make this role as mommy easier is that I can be home. I don’t have to rush out the door at 6am to go work an 8-12 hour desk job or some other job I hate when I would really be desperately wishing to be home with my babies all day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">If you feel the same way and you are working a job you hate or that isn’t beneficial for your family, please message me. I’d love nothing more than to help you earn an income from the comfort of your own home.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">God has a way of making His desires known in our hearts... and I believe that deep longing that lies within each of us “mommies” to be home with our children is truly from Him.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">#operationbringhomemommy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">#proverbs31women</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-26289100208012487082018-08-15T16:11:00.001-07:002018-08-15T16:11:28.790-07:00Don't be a dead fish<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I’ve never really gone with the flow...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">During the dark years of my addiction/mental illness I was in a constant state of inner turmoil because I never felt at peace. I was striving and striving to try and get better (or die) in my own strength and I always fell flat on my face. Doing things my way always brings chaos, confusion and discontentment. And consequently, separates me from God and His ways.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">-Romans 12:2 | NKJV</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Doing things God’s way and against the ways of the world is sometimes very difficult... like we’re swimming upstream in an ocean of wavering and weary people who live only for themselves.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">The Good News is that Jesus has overcome the world! And He lives within us so we also can overcome. On days where it’s extra hard to go against the flow of the world, He carries us through the overwhelming waves and pressures.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">When we don’t conform and when we renew our minds, THEN we will be able to discern God’s will for our lives!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, even when we were DEAD in trespasses, made us ALIVE together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">-Ephesians 2:4-6 | NKJV</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-1504474997404456482018-08-13T08:20:00.002-07:002018-08-13T08:21:42.652-07:00Dilemma with Certain Governmental Agencies<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">I read alot about the chemistry and health benefits of essential oils and it is SO sad to me- like I want to cry- that because of certain government agencies and because I am a distributor; I am not permitted to. Their speech laws say that I cannot allude to the fact that essential oils can prevent, treat or cure any disease. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">So. With that said, please do your own research on oils. Make sure the company you are buying from is legit and that they have their hand in the beginning stages of the growth of the plant- all the way to the harvesting and distilling. Make sure they own their own farms and distilleries too. ALSO make sure they test their batches with at least a dozen different kinds of tests. Not just GCMS... that's very important. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "trebuchet ms" , sans-serif;">Are you aware of the miracle of essential oils?! I'd love to hear from you!</span><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-20810407046222735832018-08-12T06:22:00.002-07:002018-08-12T12:30:13.892-07:00Welcome to my virtual space - Official Free Woman<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Hi there! Welcome to my blog... the space where I can be FREE to be me. </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>I haven't written in a few years on here, as you can see, but thought it was time I started up again.</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>And I am excited! I LOVE writing. I am an author and have a book on Amazon entitled, From Heroin to Heaven - got it from my blog name ;)</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>I hope you enjoy your time here! God bless.</b></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-23085556451063352602018-08-11T10:35:00.002-07:002018-08-12T12:30:00.166-07:00Who is a Titus 2 Woman?<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">My relationship with my Creator is so important to me... to trust His perfect design and plan for me is not always easy, but it brings so much peace when I lay down my own plans and fully embrace His. ✨</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: roboto, robotodraft, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">There are several scriptures about a wife/mother’s role in the Bible... just like there is for a husband/father.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: roboto, robotodraft, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">This particular scripture I used to scoff at, but now, as I surrender more and more of my life to Jesus, I see the importance of this more clearly than ever before. ✨</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: roboto, robotodraft, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">To blaspheme God means to disrespect, bring shame upon and rebel against Him. Woah. As a Kingdom-minded believer this is the last thing I want to do.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: roboto, robotodraft, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">So the opposite of these traits listed in the scripture below that would indicate we are blaspheming God is if we were to: hate our husband and children, if we were loud and obnoxious, if we were unpure, if we didn’t make a home, if we were bad, and disobedient to our husbands (keep in mind here that being obedient to your husband does </span><b style="background-color: white; font-family: roboto, robotodraft, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">not</b><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;"> mean to accept abuse and/or infidelity).</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">I‘ve got a lot of these I’m still working on... but like I said, my relationship with Jesus is first and it’s my desire to live by the standards that He has set for me. ✨</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; font-family: roboto, robotodraft, helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;" />
<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "roboto" , "robotodraft" , "helvetica" , "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px; white-space: pre-wrap;">I hope you’re encouraged today to write His Word upon your heart and to seek Jesus and His righteousness first so that everything else can be added unto you.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-56917061480437023492016-04-07T16:31:00.000-07:002016-04-07T16:31:58.306-07:00Link to purchase my book!Hey fellow bloggers! Just dropping in for a second to give you the link for my book... PLEASE pass on to someone you know who needs help or an encouraging word. God bless you all! I miss blogging... I may need to jump back in soon... life is finally starting to slow down a bit for me..<br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif; font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.amazon.com/Heroin-Heaven-collection-entries-addicted/dp/1502791528/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1460071759&sr=8-1&keywords=from+heroin+to+heaven" target="_blank">Click here to purchase FROM HEROIN TO HEAVEN</a></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-47853270156884646222015-11-03T13:38:00.002-08:002015-11-03T13:38:29.866-08:00Addict turned AuthorHey ya'll, sorry it's been so long since my last entry. I have been writing my book. Signing off blogging for awhile so I can go back to writing and reading. But if you are interested in my book, entitled FROM HEROIN TO HEAVEN, then please get it. I have my book already in rehabs and jails. That is where it needs to be. <br />
<br />
<a href="http://www.amazon.com/Heroin-Heaven-collection-entries-addicted/dp/1502791528/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1446586543&sr=8-1&keywords=from+heroin+to+heaven">from heroin to heaven </a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-10835114903089269572014-10-11T07:11:00.001-07:002014-10-11T07:11:33.315-07:00abortionabortion is something you never get over.<br />
you process, your wounds may heal, you understand you are forgiven: <br />
but the fact still remains that what you've done is permanent.<br />
when the abortion doctors told me they were ready to 'terminate the pregnancy,'<br />
they looked me not so well in the eyes and assured me there was 'no baby forming in my womb, but that is was just a bunch of cells.'<br />
as a 17 year old cocaine addict, I was too numb and in pain to comprehend the facts.<br />
what I've learned is this:<br />
we all make horrible, life-shattering decisions when we are hurting and not walking with God...<br />
but what's so amazing about Jesus is that while we are making these decisions-<br />
He is stretching out His hands to us and whispering, <br />
'I love you anyway.'Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-31564643741811140992014-02-25T06:39:00.001-08:002014-02-25T06:40:24.358-08:00giving glory to God through dance and testimony...praise Jesus:)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NBRlYaSMMNk/Uwyq_Xf7AcI/AAAAAAAAAfQ/D7m4bmL92kI/s1600/madeformore.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NBRlYaSMMNk/Uwyq_Xf7AcI/AAAAAAAAAfQ/D7m4bmL92kI/s1600/madeformore.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-28530410941760844942014-01-06T13:15:00.001-08:002014-01-06T13:15:32.523-08:00searching the soul<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">over and over i am hearing to rest, to wait, to be strong, to wait, to wait...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">and in time you will find the answers your soul seeks.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">not only hearing but seeing and reading in the word... God always confirms what He is saying through scripture. if you think you are hearing God and it doesn't line up with scripture, then you are probably hearing your own projection of truth. and when you find the truth it will bring freedom. when i focus on my sometimes twisted perception of reality it brings fear and chaos within.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Psalm 37:7</span><br />
Be still in the presence of the <span class="small-caps" style="font-variant: small-caps;">Lord</span>,<br /><span class="indent-1"><span class="indent-1-breaks"> </span><span class="text Ps-37-7">and wait patiently for him to act.</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7"></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7"><span style="font-family: Arial;">Psalm 27:14</span></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7">Wait patiently for the <span class="small-caps">Lord</span>. Be brave and courageous. </span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7">Yes, wait patiently for the <span class="small-caps">Lord</span>.</span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7"></span></span><br />
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7"><strong><u><span style="color: #0066cc;"></span></u></strong><a href="http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Lamentations+3:26&version=NLT"><strong></strong></a><span style="font-family: Arial;">Lamentations 3:26</span></span></span><br />
<div>
So it is good to wait quietly for salvation from the <span class="small-caps">Lord</span>.</div>
<span class="indent-1"><span class="text Ps-37-7"></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">take time to be silent and wait...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-78521326727369134132013-12-08T13:04:00.003-08:002013-12-08T13:04:58.205-08:00powerful praise<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">i awoke with a powerful, passionate presence of God in my room last night... </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">my dream was of a bus with lots of people in it and we were traveling across desert land. the bus had open sides with bars to hang onto. it reminded me of the diesel cameo trucks we would travel in this summer when i was at missionary school in Africa.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">i was swinging on the bars half dancing, half laughing, half out of my mind just praising God loudly and with all my heart... full of the joy of the Lord! it was a sweet time of happiness, rest and contentment in His presence... praise is irresistible when He is so near.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">there was an old, poor black man with a cane... he was struggling to get on the bus... he was trying to run as much as he could. but he was more like hobbling. i remember his hat and rags he was wearing. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">i stopped praising and noticed this man struggling to run after the bus. i reached out my right hand and held onto the bar with my left hand, barely able to keep a grasp with the rough terrain and my whole body hanging off the bus. he was reaching for me and i kept reaching for him... everyone on the bus was telling me, "no we cant take this man with us, he is poor and dirty!!" and i kept responding with, "what are you talking about!? yes we can!!" </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">maybe the poor black man was representing Jesus... how can we say we love Jesus if the pride of our hearts wont allow us to reach out to the needy and dirty? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;"><i>"I was hungry and you gave me food, I was thirsty and you gave me drink, I was a stranger and you welcomed me, I was naked and you clothed me, I was sick and you visited me... Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me." </i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, Times New Roman, serif;">-Jesus</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-77707175823235242522013-11-12T05:00:00.000-08:002013-11-12T05:02:28.876-08:00what is sleep anyway<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">utterly exhausted. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">ive been running in my sleep all night. fighting. wrestling and my strength waning.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i was screaming and shouting and attempting to break free. i remember red eyes glowing and waiting for me. the fear was overwhelming and i felt so scared. i knew what I needed to do, so i prayed in tongues and yelled His name, 'Jesus!' </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">the only one who can save.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i finally woke in middle of night due to punching and kicking and yelling... that must have woke me up. i made it to the bathroom and kept speaking the blood of Jesus over me... i made it back to sleep eventually. just trusting God to protect me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">the reason i think this is important to write about is probably #1 it helps me process and let go #2 i think people need to know that just because you are a believer it doesn't mean you're problems and struggles go away. in fact, you will have spiritual warfare when you believe in Jesus... this is one evidence of your salvation, out of many.</span> <br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and also, for those that are struggling with addiction... bad memories and flashbacks still occur in my mind. is this was caused my nightmare/warfare? i don't know. but what i do know is- it is now a matter of choosing what to believe about myself. i can either choose to believe i am worthless and should be dead and in hell because of my life/sins/moral failures. OR i can choose to believe that Jesus came to seek and to save the LOST. and that there is nothing i can do to make myself a 'good person' we are ALL sinners who have ALL fallen short of the glory of God. not any single person on earth deserves to go to heaven. but because of Gods everlasting and unwavering, passionate love toward us- He made a Way. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">the Way is Jesus Christ.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-75796194416997925492013-10-30T08:08:00.001-07:002013-10-30T08:08:54.002-07:00new worldstoday i am in a foggy state... just returned once again from Africa... this time Nigeria. the whirlwind is still very active in my life. another adventure of witnessing souls being brought to Jesus and praying for poor and brokenhearted children. another reacclimating time... readjusting yet again to insane, fast, busy NYC ministry life. thankfully i have acquired the skills necessary to be such a wandering nomad on earth and can adapt and figure out each new world i enter as it comes.<br />
<br />
one new world that i am about to enter is the world of marriage! in 6 months i will be leaving my job, my apartment, my friends, my family and the only security and familiarity i've had in a long time since coming back to God 4 years ago. this 'security' is and always has been temporary. if i were to find security in people, places or jobs then my faith in Jesus Christ would be worthless. i have no fear in slaying giants, telling demons to go to hell, trampling on snakes and scorpions or any such thing. what is funny and hilarious is that i have fear in being rested... a warrior who has retreated from the fight for lost and struggling drug addicts. not that i am any less than a person for leaving teen challenge, but that who i am is so entangled with what i do. how many times do i speak to others about their identity in Christ and how they are a child of God, not a slave or performer to earn their way into the arms of Father God? it is time to practice what i preach... and fully accept this new position and calling God is moving me to... to be a wife and mother. to bring life to souls in another way, a new way, a practical family way. i am leaving a high stress, high demand, burn out- prone life to embrace my new role as a nurturer and parent?! amazing. i am up for this new adventure. with God as my teacher, i am ready for a new world to explore.<br />
<br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-89133970812498721182013-09-01T19:26:00.003-07:002013-09-01T19:26:29.887-07:00inspired by gandhi"whatever you do in life will be insignificant; but its very important that you do it." -gandhi<br />
<br />
these last four months for me have been a complete whirlwind. organizing my thoughts and memories are of no use. God keeps moving and placing me in situations that change my perspective, my heart, my outlook... my everything. <br />
<br />
3rd world Africa was a physically challenging experience. I wouldn't say that it was more physically challenging than heroin or methadone withdrawal- but that wasn't necessarily a voluntary thing... when demons possess your life- you are a slave to them and self no longer exists. 3rd world was physically challenging because its hard to get clean without water, dehydration was normalcy, it was difficult walking to the well to get water and carrying it back to your bathroom area, it was difficult eating rice everyday, it was weird not being online for 5 hours a day(this one I kind of liked, because then I could really shut out the 1st world and just embrace life without technology)... it was only difficult because I couldn't really communicate with loved ones.<br />
Africa was the most spiritually rested time I've ever had since turning my heart back to Jesus. I felt in the midst of living in complete poverty and physical discomfort that my spirit was soaring and flying and that precisely because of no dependence on material things that I was fully able to let go of all that can weigh us down. when you don't depend on things- but only on God- it makes life so easy to live! I have a newfound eyesight on what is important and what is not. and quite frankly, about 90% of the time we worry about things that don't matter and never will matter- they only matter in our puny, greedy, fearful, paranoid minds. <br />
<br />
awhile ago I wrote about a boy that showed up here interested in me, he has shown me nothing but the love of Jesus. he has asked to marry me and I said yes! I am so happy and blessed that God sent him to me... it increases my faith so much knowing that exactly what I prayed for was exactly what showed up at my door one night in January. <br />
<br />
here at work... at the ministry of teen challenge... I am talking to God about moving on... I feel a shift in what my ministry will be next..... I am getting married so therefore I will be a minister of the family:) I love experiencing God in different places, worlds, homes, people, nature, clouds, thunder and movement. He is everywhere... and I want to be where He is. so take me God, lets go.<br />
<br />
on top of the many changes in my life lately, another event happened in my lineage of 'series of fortunate events' ;) ..........<br />
the other night I helped my coworker deliver her baby boy into the world. I got there just in time that her water broke. her husband was there, and their 2 year old was sleeping in other room. it all happened so fast and I kept praying the whole time and did as much as I could. I called 911 and they talked us through what to do... I still haven't fully thought this one through exactly.... but last night in bed I kept laughing and thanking God for what He has been doing and just how fun it is to be living for Him. <br />
<br />
life with God is anything but boring. <br />
<br />
in conclusion to my 10pm ramblings... I conclude that there isn't much to conclude! <br />
life never ends... and on this side of eternity its not about pleasing self, but pleasing God. <br />
live your life for Him and be FULL. live your life for self and you will always be empty.<br />
<br />
"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." -gandhiAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-49110390156419420232013-08-13T03:13:00.001-07:002013-08-13T03:14:19.140-07:00South africa<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_ahgbPynV3E/UgoGrguqc4I/AAAAAAAAAbM/UtW0PlpenjQ/s1600/IMG_1170.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_ahgbPynV3E/UgoGrguqc4I/AAAAAAAAAbM/UtW0PlpenjQ/s400/IMG_1170.JPG" /></a></div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-10559941222700247562013-08-12T17:07:00.002-07:002013-08-13T06:39:26.974-07:00back from africa<b>IDENTITY
</b><br />
<b>Romans 8:14-15 New Living Translation (NLT) </b><br />
<b>For all who are led by the Spirit of God are children of God. So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, “Abba, Father.” </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b>* I could write about all the difficulty of the 3rd world, the bugs, the food, the hateful muslims, the danger, etc, etc… but there’s a truth I received this summer- a revelation on identity. * </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b>Biggest difference I saw between the village children and the Iris(adopted) children wasn’t their clothing and attire- although that was quite different. But the biggest difference was their behavior: - Orphans beg, steal, manipulate, are hungry and depressed - Orphans are fearful slaves - Adopted children give, love, are well- fed and content - Adopted children are free * </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b>Our identity is crucial in our walk with God and understanding of who exactly He is * If we believe we are unloved and worthless then we will certainly act that way * </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b>One night I was staring at the stars and just talking with God… I asked Him what I could do for Him, what He wanted from me, what I could do, etc… He told me, “Mariah, you’re not a prostitute anymore, stop asking me what you can do for Me, stop selling yourself to me.” I was taken aback… then He said to me, “tell me what I can do for you? What do you want Me to do for you?” I immediately received what He spoke to me with love, and quickly thought about what He said like a corrected daughter would. So I asked Him for a shooting star. I was second guessing whether that was God speaking that to me or not- so I wanted the shooting star also as a confirmation and a secret love gift to me from my Father. About 30 seconds later there goes the shooting star… :) </b><br />
<b></b><br />
<b>* God does not want, need or require anything from us. Nothing. There is nothing we can do or say to be more or less loved. * What do you believe about yourself? Who do you believe you are? * What you believe about yourself will come out in your behavior… God wants you to walk in your true identity. He wants to adopt us and become our ‘abba father’ our ‘poppa’ … and to experience the life of a happy, free child of God… rescued and saved into the most loving family that exists:) </b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-83369833088072535662013-05-14T13:40:00.000-07:002013-05-14T13:40:06.508-07:00my Jesus<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">last night i was swept away once again by my Jesus!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">i am so thirsty for His presence... He made Himself known to me last night and stopped me dead in my tracks. my sweet Jesus.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">the only thing i could do was stand still and feel Him. this was an encounter i needed to assure me that i am in Gods will. i need to know i am going in the right direction all the time. every second. there is nothing i can do without Him.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">i could describe the heavy presence of God, but it would not do justice... so i will just leave it at that. that i was swept away. intoxicated by Him. drawn to Him. so in love with Him. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">He is love... and when we have an encounter with God- it is the very essence of melting in the glory of perfect love.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial;">peace, peace... my soul will rest in You.</span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-20778147340265927732013-05-01T08:53:00.001-07:002013-05-01T08:53:17.375-07:00lunch break/blog break... same thing... <span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">just needed to ramble i guess... im anxiously awaiting another God-given, God-ordained adventure that i will leave for in 26 days! missions training in AFRICA! never had so much peace in my life about totally surrendering to hardships, discomfort, 3rd world obstacles, or lack of any familiarity i've ever built up in this life- not that i have much... but i know that spiritual treasures are not found in things or possessions-but in faith. and i am ready to go treasure hunting! my faith is ready to fly to new heights and experience supernatural miracles and wonders. my faith is being stirred as i anticipate this love affair with my Savior. He already has given me so much grace and love... my brain is stumped on how much more He is going to lavish upon me in the spiritual realm. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">but God says, <em>"there is still more!" </em> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><strong>Psalm 16:11</strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><strong>You make known to me the path of life;</strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><strong>In Your presence there is fullness of joy;</strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"><strong>At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.</strong></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia;"><em>this promise SO excites me!</em></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">a man after Gods heart, who i will call "Z," showed up one day in january at my front door and i have been getting to know him alot these past months. as i get ready for Africa i am also embracing this man into my life of total devotion to Jesus. i am embracing him because i have been praying for a man to literally just show up in my life who loves Jesus as much, if not more, than i do. his heart is set on serving God. my heart is set on serving God. is "Z" who God wants for me? the figurings of how exactly God works and does things is beyond my miniscule 28 years of being a Christian, then not, then back again. a prodigal daughter brought to her full inheritance? even though she was a former slave to all evil, sin and sickness? again, my mind wont let me understand the goodness of God or His all-knowing, ever-present and all-powerful character. this is just something i have to accept. in my heart- i certainly do accept it... even though my mind tries to fight me on it! i have been in alot of prayer about this man i am calling "Z" and considering a possible life with him instead of sojourning this planet alone. could an insane lover of Jesus share that kind of love with someone else? could it increase my love for Jesus by also loving a man? questions i ask myself... knowing that it is not up to me to decide, nor configure. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif;">praise the Lord for His infinite wisdom and leading in this dedicated, servant girls life:)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Georgia;"></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-27705436204065562692013-03-13T14:20:00.001-07:002013-03-13T14:23:49.282-07:00my column on the Brooklyn Teen Challenge e-magazine<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The <st1:city w:st="on"><st1:place w:st="on">Pearl</st1:place></st1:city>
of Great Price<o:p></o:p></span></b><br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">- <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Words and Wisdom from
a Modern Day Mary Magdalene, by Mariah N. Tramonto<o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Some of you may know me as Brother Don Wilkerson’s
assistant, some know me as a missionary, others may know me as a sold out Jesus
freak, or as a school of ministry graduate, and as a Walter Hoving Home
graduate. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Still others know me as a
dancer, a poet, a dreamer, a visionary, a lover of children or as an old lady
because I go to bed so early and drink tea at 8pm every night.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">But do
you know me as an i.v. heroin user?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A
crack addict?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A mentally ill suicidal
mess?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>A prostitute? Do you look at me
and think I am a worthless, hopeless human being?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></i>When I was all of these things, God saw
through that ugliness and saw my true worth.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>His love has so pierced my soul that it is my responsibility to tell
others of His redemptive power, His everlasting love… His goodness… His mercy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">There are a lot of new things God is doing in this season
within each of us.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>One of which I
believe is across the board for all of us, in that He is trying to communicate
to us His <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">full </i>acceptance of our
condition in new ways.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I think the
church as a whole is receiving the same message of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">complete </i>reliance on the Holy Spirit… that we are nothing but a
breath in this life… that we need to move out of the way and let God work
through us as He so desires.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God is
trying to tell us we are<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"> fully</i>
accepted, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">fully</i> loved, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">fully</i> cared for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We aren’t just loved when we do good
things.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We aren’t just accepted when we
act normal and aren’t misbehaving.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We
are being awakened by the revelation of divine rest and complete peace as we
cling to the Cross, our Anchor, our Hope and our Salvation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Matthew 13:45-46</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 0pt;">
<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The <st1:place w:st="on"><st1:placetype w:st="on">Kingdom</st1:placetype>
of <st1:placename w:st="on">Heaven</st1:placename></st1:place> is like a
merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great
price, he went and sold all that he had and bought it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">This parable focuses on the merchant, Jesus, and the thing
that sticks out so much is that it is <b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Jesus searching for us</i>.</b><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We are the pearls He is looking for.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I thought it interesting that God is
comparing us to pearls- so I looked up the process of pearl creation.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>There are mollusks that sit on the bottom of
the ocean and when an intruding agent enters the mollusk, the mollusk
immediately produces a chemical to form a hardened substance within itself.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As more intruders try to enter the mollusk,
more and more chemicals are produced to protect and shield the now forming
pearl.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The pearl represents a vessel that been constantly attacked
by intruders but has remained under the protection of the mollusk, or God’s
love.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The pearl transforms from nothing
into not only something, but something beautiful and of great price.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Intruding spiritual attacks bring about spiritual beauty
when we remain under Gods protection and love.<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">Jesus is using the object of pearls to illustrate our great
value.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>We ask in our flesh, <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">“how can someone that’s been intruded upon
and attacked be worth anything at all?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>How am I worth anything?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Doesn’t
God see how beaten up I am, how ugly inside I really am?”</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The answer is no.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>God
does not see our ‘ugliness,’ our ‘bruises,’ our ‘scars from intruders’… When He
looks at us, He sees beauty.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">He does not see our sin.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He sees love.<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">The truth is that Jesus not only died for our sins but He
sold everything He had- His life- for the most beaten up of us all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The story of Jesus shows God’s love coming
down to earth to save us all.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Jesus also especially came for the ones who
have been so attacked and hated on by the world and in fact, He even calls
these ones beautiful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">1 Timothy 1:15, “This is a faithful saying and worthy of
acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners, of whom I am
chief.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "Calibri","sans-serif"; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman";">We are beautiful pearls found by our Merchant, Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let us rest today in trusting our Father
instead of trusting our self.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Let us
find acceptance in the arms of Jesus.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Let us make the choice to walk in our full inheritance today.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-46488388467477612672013-02-25T04:35:00.002-08:002013-02-26T03:49:46.738-08:00rats and fliesdreams of disgust that drag me into the deep<br />
only come to torment me in my sleep<br />
<br />
the mind, ive tried, to push out the things that creep<br />
this process though, is not easy to complete<br />
<br />
settling slowly softly i wait<br />
for Jesus my Savior to rescue my unconscious fate<br />
<br />
rats attack me<br />
flies and bees swarm into my space<br />
its only natural to think im not free<br />
its supernatural to believe Jesus is my saving grace<br />
<br />
all along this path of pilgrimage <br />
i learn to find the way and feel<br />
dreams of the past i cannot manage<br />
sometimes they still seem so real<br />
<br />
God. my hope, my help, my healer<br />
He alone can protect me from the peace- stealer<br />
<br />
Jesus. my sanity, my rest, my redeemer<br />
He alone can cleanse my mind of evil<br />
<br />
The Holy Spirit. my comforting hug, the wisper in my ears<br />
i pray to ask Him to forgive and wipe my tears<br />
<br />
<em>"you are a new creation and your past is gone along with your sins. these dreams come straight from hell to torture and scare you... Satan is the father of lies and he wants you back. but i won't let him have you. trust in Me, in My Word and remember your deliverance in Christ. the blood of Jesus cleanses you from all unrighteousness. your past is gone, your past is gone, your past is gone along with your sins."</em>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-14882062272895134492013-02-04T08:39:00.002-08:002013-02-04T08:39:52.564-08:00simplicity and humilityim breathing a big sigh of relief as this past season is coming to an END!<br />
<br />
thank you GOD. i feel it passing.<br />
<br />
i feel finally the old dross of the past year is being swept away. the darkness, sadness and confusion lasted a while and it was only so much longer that i could hold on. i remember crying every night asking God what is was He wanted me to learn and how could i get some relief... never got a clear answer, but always felt in my spirit the simple words- <em>'be still.'</em><br />
<br />
what do the dark times teach us? <br />
to remain low<br />
to cling to Jesus<br />
to remind us of our deep need for God<br />
to teach us about true spiritual authority, because Gods power is made perfect in our weakness<br />
to give us hope of a new day, a brighter day that will come<br />
to remind us that this isnt our final resting place- there is something much more beautiful that awaits<br />
to teach us about ourselves- what is really inside of us- our character, motives<br />
<br />
by keeping thoughts simple and maintaining the awareness of my every-second-need for God, i achieve a peace that passes my mind and goes into my heart.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-39396168713642765702013-01-03T06:33:00.003-08:002013-01-03T06:33:54.446-08:00i love to create for Jesus<a href="http://youtu.be/KUo6LeJqJ60" title="http://youtu.be/KUo6LeJqJ60"><span style="font-family: Tahoma; font-size: x-small;">http://youtu.be/KUo6LeJqJ60</span></a><br />
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-735438988218815758.post-53715103624483504042012-12-26T13:12:00.001-08:002012-12-26T13:12:29.728-08:00called to be a ministeri just am coming out of a 2 month battle of hellish sickness. finally feeling almost normal- but then again i never really feel normal- so this might be as normal as it gets!<br />
<br />
on the subject of becoming a minister of the faith: i am wrestling with 2 things. 1- i am sometimes doubting my calling... as far as if i am supposed to do what i eventually want to do. i think that when figuring out what to do in life it shouldnt be about what you do- but more of who you are. i think sometimes i focus on the wrong things... like its not about what i can do or not do. in the area of ministry its about who you are inside and how effectively i can communicate the love of Jesus to people. not even by words... because most of the time people just say they see the light in me, or that the way i spoke to them, that they could perceive i was a follower of Jesus. it is those moments i love the best- when i am not even trying to communicate Jesus and i just do anyway! Also, on this one, i struggle with the coming to terms that God actually wants me to become a minister... i just dont feel adequate or that i am good enough to be that. but i suppose that is precisely why He has called me... because He uses the weak. number 2- making a commitment. i have always been as loyal as i could be... but being a drug user i made a lot of bad moves as far as breaking promises. for 4 years i havent broke any promise that ive made yet! and i dont ever want to be someone that breaks them... why would you trust someone like that? anyway, the commitment... i am commited to God 100% and i love to spread His word. however, i guess its just becoming very real to me- this lifelong walk. lately i have been just pressing through and pressing through some real hard and dark times... and i know that being a minister i am to be prepared in season and out of season. and its just that- its making the choice to minister even when i feel like dying. its those moments that i take shelter under the wings of the Almighty and learn to rest there for a while. <br />
<br />
learn to rest... still learning about that one.<br />
<br />
so with this wrestle of doubting what God has placed in me as far as what i am to do and enduring the lifelong call of a minister- i am trying to just take everything that is coming at me right now with wisdom and prayer. im 28 years old. feel like im 128. and just trying to walk this thing out. Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12086227072074233115noreply@blogger.com2