i am reminded of a vision i once had about a year ago...
i was in shredded towel-like clothing, sweating and panting
in the desert.
now that i am learning more about the Bible,
i am realizing what an impact the desert is- biblically.
in the dictionary, the desert means- barren and without water or vegetation.
currently i am feeling dry. feeling no presence of God.
i feel i have no springs of water overflowing inside of me...
but i am sure of the Spirit within me.
in the Bible, people were taken to the desert for preparation...
and for the self to be stripped away and for full reliance on God.
it appears as if i am in the desert.
my soul is dried out- but i am repentant for that.
i am trying to lean not on my understanding of how things should work- or even how God should work in me.
He can work through me however He wants! who am i to say that what i am experiencing right now is wrong. maybe i have not done something so terrible (as my perfectionistic personality might have led me to believe) but maybe God has taken me to the desert to take away my worldly thoughts, motivations, whatever. and to bring to my mind the importance of just depending on Him... no one, and nothing else but Him.
my prayer is that my faith will be restored, that my boldness will come back again, and that my love for Jesus will burn forever.
maybe i am in the desert for preparation...
YES! Prepare Me!