Tuesday, August 3, 2010

waiting

I remember waiting in line for welfare services when I would be high on dope.
I would have a fit and swear and sometimes just walk right out, without seeing
Anyone.
My mindset would be, 'don't these people know I exist??? The world should stop
For me.'
...so ignorant.

So now that I'm sitting here at walk-in dentist with infected tooth, because I have neglected
My teeth for so many years, because heroin and crack were first
Priority... I'm feeling frustrated.
Instead of reacting with rage and disrespect, I am taking
Deep breaths and trusting God will make something happen.
I am not sure they will even see me, as they have already taken
Their three walk-ins for the day...
The perfect place to be for God to do his best work, is right here.
Not knowing ANYTHING that will happen... and knowing that if anything good does
Happen, that its ALL God.

A good strategy in this situation is to remember what I'm grateful for
And to know that as long as I'm not in crackhead hell,
I'm in absolute heaven!

1 comment:

  1. you are an inspiration, Mariah. thankyou for sharing part of your life with us and for your honesty. I really like how you responded in this situation, i wish i was better at that, :)

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