Romans 9:17

Romans 9:17
"I raised you up for this very purpose, that I might display my
power in you and that my name might be proclaimed in all the
earth."

someone that i work with asked me yesterday,
as he was looking at my pictures on my bulletin board,
'did u ever think u would be having ur own office and
helping other drug addicts?'

i said,'no, i never thought i would be alive to make it
that far.'

'u should be proud of urself, ur one of the few.'

i never thought that my suffering and my addiction could be
useful for ANY reason.
it only caused so much sorrow and grief.

i also never thought someone would come into MY office
and look at MY bulletin board, at MY pictures and
ask me about how it feels to be on other side.

i still feel like im not in reality sometimes.

i was just eating lunch downstairs and some of the people
that go to school here made me feel bad because of the
job i have here.

they were upset because i have certain priveleges that they
dont have.
and i didnt know what to say,
so i just stared at them like,
'im sorry, i dont know how to make this right, so that u dont
feel that way about me.'

but i couldnt say that,

because i felt like crying.
and i hate crying in front of people.
and i feel bad that they feel that way...
it hurts me.

i think the wise thing to do is just pray for them.
and to be so grateful that i have a thankful heart...

...even if i were to be washing someones feet...